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Monday, December 10, 2012

I'm back!

This has been a rough couple of months but I am pulling through it now. Feeling better physically and starting to get things accomplished again.

There are still hurdles, of course. Waiting on another round of blood work results to check my thyroid and liver functions; that gang of crazy-ass squirrels harassing cats, stealing laundry and blocking sidewalks at my apartment complex; truck repairs; medical bills; dental bills; internet problems, blah, blah, blah...

The good news is that the cervical biopsy results came back negative for cancer. No treatment required, just follow up tests in six months. What a huge relief! Of course I was dealing with the broken tooth and root extraction when that call came so I didn't get to jump up and down much. That has also finally healed up satisfactorily and not giving me any grief anymore. The body aches and severe joint pain that must have been caused by a combination of the pneumonia and the medicines I had to take for it has also gotten much better in just the last week. It is still there, but not nearly as bad as it had been. And I finally got a little time with my man after more than two long months, which always lifts my mood.

The better news is that I had 5 headache free days. Not just migraine free, but HEADACHE FREE.

I have checked all of the paintings and statues in my house, none are crying or bleeding. I have pinched myself repeatedly and have not yet awakened from a very boring dream about the sensation of 'not pain' and how weird it feels. My best guess is that this could be really happening. If my brain happens to be in a jar in a lab somewhere then hat's off to the lab tech that removed that particular electrode.

So, what happened?

I made a couple of very small changes to my treatment plan just over a week ago after seeing the doctor for throat constriction and joint pain. I started taking prilosec for possible reflux. I separated my two daily pills to different times in case they were affecting each other's absorption. And I started taking an herbal tincture for cleansing and strengthening the lymph system. The headaches stopped immediately. The joint pain and stiffness started to fade quickly. I feel good. I still have the normal pmdd symptoms but I just feel better in general.

Normal is not a normal state of being for me. The first day I kept thinking I had a weird feeling and couldn't put my finger on it. I finally realized it was 'not pain'. It becomes a part of you after a long time, and it's absence feels abnormal. I am starting to enjoy 'not pain' and hope I can continue to try and get used to it. A new normal would be ok. I could adjust.

I plan to continue this routine and monitor it for a minimum of two months and go from there. If the emotional symptoms keep bleeding through the yasmin even after that time then I will go off of it. At that point I face the beast head on. 6 months without hormones to see what exactly my brain and body are trying to do. It's a scary prospect, but should make for interesting reading.

It's a nonstop funhouse ride sometimes but I ain't getting off no matter how rocky it gets.

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